ࡱ> DFCE@ bjbj .<3db b b 8 \ 2  :P P P P P P GIIIIII$RLm P P   mP P h h h  P P Gh  Gh (h {P r<b * vG0, P "r h  vP P P mmd~R ~ The Happiness skill Ten Top Tips We all have the capability to be happier. What practical skills can we learn that would make this possible? Tip 1 Spring clean your beliefs Write down some useful assumptions or beliefs about Happiness on to Post-it notes or small cards (one belief or assumption per card in large letters!) and place them as reminders on your desk, your fridge, the sun shield in your car and so on. Here are some suggestions Happiness is inside me therefore its in my control Happiness is a skill and therefore I can learn it I want more Happiness in XXX area of my life and I want it enough to do something about it Happiness is a habit. I can change the amount of happiness in my life in 21 days I am a happy person The skill here is to feel the happiness that comes from that belief each time you read them. Imagine its already true, even if its not yet! Tip 2 - Act as if. Act as if youre happy, even if youre not. This is not as crazy as it sounds. Consider what happens when youre unhappy. Your shoulders slump, your head drops and your mouth turns down. Its hard to be happy in that depressed position. Go on - try it! Now stand up straight, look upwards and put a smile on your face. Try this one too. Its hard to be fed up in this position. So when youre feeling down; simply stand up straight and look upwards. Walk as if youre happy. Talk as if youre happy. Developing this habit will give you the skill to look sound and feel happier any time you choose. Like any skill it may be difficult at first, so just accept that and keep going for 21 days. Soon it will be a natural Happiness Habit Tip 3 Think about whats going well in your life List all the things in life that you are grateful for. Add to this list every time you think of something else thats great in your life. Keep this list somewhere handy and refer to it every time you feel that things are getting on top of you. Our brains fix more readily on whats not going well so the skill is to train our minds to flip the negative over and dwell on the plus side. This will help you keep things in perspective Tip 4 - Pigeon-hole it! Train your brain to remember that Happiness can be pigeon holed. In other words, unhappiness in one area of your life does not mean that you need to be unhappy in every area. Keep the unhappiness pigeon-holed so that it doesnt cloud the whole of our lives. Its OK to have a good time with a friend even if we have a sick relative or if were out of a job. It doesnt mean that we dont care about the source of the unhappiness elsewhere Tip 5 Learn to laugh again Make a note of the sort of things or people - that make you laugh out loud. What can you do to expose yourself more to this kind of situation or person? We all know that laughter is the best medicine. Laughing may be a habit rather than a skill, however if youve lost the habit of seeing the funny side of things, then it takes skill and practice to regain it. Take action! The rewards are more than worth the effort Tip 6 - Happiness can be bottled This is a brilliant skill to develop and it takes a little practice. Remember some of the amazing times youve had in the past where you felt really happy. Recapture these feelings and imagine pouring them into a bottle. Every time you need cheering up, simply uncork the bottle and re-live those experiences. Tip 7 - Watch your language Language is a skill. We learn it when we are small. Sadly the language we use does not always contribute to our happiness. Review the sort of language you use and decide the parts of it you need to relearn. For example Do you habitually moan about events, people, situations? Then practise finding something good to say about them instead. Are you judgemental about what other people say and do? Instead, practise saying to yourself Let it pass Do you use lots of negatives in your language e.g. I often make mistakes. Learn how to use more positive words e.g. I often get things right Tip 8 - Make someone elses day Train your brain to look for opportunities to make someone elses day. Practise the skill of listening and empathising if someone is in trouble. Learn how to give positive feedback and be generous with your praise. Doing this regularly will make you feel good and maybe, just maybe, youll get back what you give! Tip 9 Collect the skills you need Consider the areas of your life where you are most unhappy. Is it relationship, qualifications, confidence, health, money, weight? Now consider what skills you need to develop to change these areas of unhappiness. If its relationships, then perhaps taking a course in communication skills would help. If its your weight, what do you need to learn about that would give you new and better ways of changing it. If its confidence, what books can you read or what information can you gain from the Internet that would give you the confidence you need? Tip 10 - Look through others eyes The skill of being able to put yourself in other peoples shoes and to look at yourself through their eyes is a great happiness skill to develop. For example, imagine you are a passer-by on the street looking at you. What would they see a happy-looking person or a miserable person. Imagine being a person who calls you on the telephone. How do you sound? Catch yourself reflected in a shop window how do you look? Happy or miserable? The skill here is being able to observe and listen to how you come across objectively. Armed with this information, decide what you can learn to do to come across the way you would most like to   HYPERLINK "http://www.switchtosuccess.co.uk" www.switchtosuccess.co.uk Heather Summers and Anne Watson  PAGE 2 Buy The Book of Happiness the easy way - go to  HYPERLINK "http://www.switchtosuccess.co.uk" www.switchtosuccess.co.uk and click on any picture of the book. 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